Quidditch an NCAA sport?

Photo from theage.com.au

And now for something completely random. The seventh Harry Potter film is slated to premiere this month, so of course, various networks and media outlets are jumping on the Potter hype train. Apparently, even ESPN is not immune to the Potter enchantment.

I’m at home trying to get over the last of the stomach bug that has had me down and out for the last week and a half. I see “Sports Nation” on ESPN mention in one of their segments that there is a movement by Harry Potter geeks to have the NCAA recognize Quidditch as an official collegiate sport.

For those of you not familiar with this level of geekdom, take a look at this video from CBS News.

Admittedly I am a fan of the Harry Potter books and films, but never has the thought, “I run around with a broom between my legs and play Quidditch,” ever entered my mind. Although I do not agree that Quidditch should or will ever be a recognized NCAA sport, I do see the potential for it to be a real game with a few changes.

LOSE THE BROOMS!

No one will ever take Quidditch seriously as long as people are running around with brooms between their legs. While you’re at it, do not wear robes or cloaks or capes or wizard hats or any sort of costumes in general. If you want to recognized as a sport, wear appropriate athletic wear.

Add rollerblades or ice skates

In the Harry Potter films, Quidditch is a fast, high-paced game. Since there are no flying brooms, the best way simulate the speed of this game on the ground is to have the players wear Rollerblades or to play the game on an ice rink with ice skates.

“The Snitch”

In the current version of the game, someone dressed in yellow plays the roll of the “Golden Stitch.” I feel that this does not accurately reflect the manic randomness of the Snitch in the books and film. This is why I propose the introduction of a greased pig. That’s right. Imagine the madness that will ensue when a greased pig is let loose into the skating rink and the two Seekers are frantically chasing after it while the rest of the game is going on around them.

What do you think, should Quidditch be a sport?