Leaning into Gratitude

By the time you read this, Thanksgiving will be nearing, so for this editor’s note, I’m writing about gratitude. Like many people, I’ve embraced gratitude as a way toward a better life. This year, it’s become a daily practice, and like a muscle, the more you work it, the stronger it gets.

Image: Getty Images, simplehappyart

What am I grateful for? Big and little things. My close relationship to my 20-year-old daughter, who is independent, thoughtful and loving. My health. Having a job that allows me to edit, write and be creative. But I’m also grateful for my morning coffee, yoga three times a week, and the monk seal that I can hear barking at sunset from my living room.

Every morning, I jot down a few things in a gratitude journal, even when I’m not feeling great. It’s become a routine, like brushing my teeth. The practice has shifted my mind to focus on the good, which is especially needed during these times.

Sometimes, I’m grateful for something very specific: “Grateful I can make a broccoli chickpea stew I really like,” I wrote one day. “Grateful to have Lana as my goddaughter.” (Lana is an adorable, 1-year-old golden retriever who lives next door.)

Other times, my gratitude message is like a call to action, to remind myself of big-picture goals: “Grateful to be 100% accountable for my life,” I wrote one morning. “Grateful I’m not worried what others think of me,” was another.

I wasn’t always like this. In fact, I spent many years being just the opposite—expecting things to go my way and displeased the moment they didn’t. When I was a 26-year-old reporter working for the Los Angeles Times, I had a great job in a cool city with good friends to hang out with and no real responsibilities other than to take care of myself. Yet, I remember complaining a lot and being discontent that I wasn’t rising up the journalism ranks as fast as I wanted. How come I’m not writing more front-page stories? How come he got promoted?

Now, I think to myself, “What the heck was wrong with you?” It’s a shame how many years I spent focused on what was wrong and bad. If I met my 20-something or even 30-something self today, I wouldn’t hold back: “You’re sabotaging yourself. You really need perspective. You’re being a brat!”

So yes, things changed for the better, they had to. How I was wasn’t working; actually, it made me miserable. I needed another way.

It’s not that these days everything is going swimmingly. I still have daily challenges like everyone else, and I still find myself griping about them. But now I catch myself, and remember to be thankful for my life just as it is. I’m in standstill traffic on Ala Wai Boulevard, and late … (You should be happy you have a good working car to get you where you need to go.) I wake up with an achy lower back … (That back has held you up well for more than five decades.) Work is piling up … (You are fortunate to be working as a journalist.)

You get the idea. I am living a life of gratitude, and it’s been affirming. I highly recommend it.

So happy Thanksgiving! Sharing stories with you makes my job a pleasure. I mean it—I’m beyond thankful.

Introducing HONOLULU Home      

This month, we are launching the HONOLULU Home Resource Guide, filled with listings for anyone looking to design, repair or remodel their home. If you are a regular reader of our sister publication Hawai‘i Home + Remodeling, it may look familiar. The guide was a longstanding feature of Hawai‘i Home + Remodeling, which has transitioned to be part of a new section called HONOLULU Home. We are excited to offer our readers expanded coverage of home design, which has long been one of the editorial pillars of our brand.

Diane Seo is the editorial director of HONOLULU Magazine.